Monday, June 25, 2012

Making my way to the finish line......slow....very slowly.....

While these past few months have flew by, it still feels like yesterday I was sitting in this very chair talking about who we would invite to the wedding. This past Thursday was our 2 month anniversary. No I am not counting per say; I am more trying to move on. Yes, that is what I will say move on.

Back in May I posted that my depression has set in. This was true and truly is true. I have been having a hard time doing most anything that deals with the word “wedding”. Friends and family have tried to explain that this was nothing to be depressed of. However a dear friend did understand what I meant and was going through. As she explained I needed to focus my energy on other thing, maybe get a hobby, start reading, or get a second job. These were all very good ideas and I started on my way to “heal”. Or should I say my way of accepting.

While D and I have been staying busy around the house (as you can see by our posts) I still would shut the door to our spare bedroom and ignore the situation at hand. My mother or father would explain how I needed to get the wedding stuff out of their den so they can officially make it a den again, and I would just say oh yes I’ll get to it. I had my grandmother and mother explaining how I needed to send out thank you’s and I would just ignore that too.

A few weeks ago I broke open our list of attendees and presents they gave us. I slowly started writing the thank you notes. Next thing I knew, I was handing all of them over to D and asking for his signature before they were placed in the mail. Hurdle number one done!

As soon as they were out in the mail, I walked into my spare bedroom and took my wedding dress that still lay on the bed all nice and neat. I placed the wedding dress in the closet, until I could get help to place it in its bag. I then took all the wedding cards and placed them in a zip lock bag and into a box; I did the same for the shower presents.  That was enough for one day…”I thought”

Some days later, I got in my head, that I would gather all my wedding items from my parents and bring them back to my house. Before I did this I wanted plastic totes in hand so once they entered my house they would be placed carefully in organized bins and up into the attic. I did buy the totes and they are successfully sitting in my dining room.  I also managed to bring all my wedding stuff to my house. However, the wedding stuff is now sitting in my spare bed room (thanks to my hubby!) and my totes are still sitting in the dining room.  This is as far as I made it……..A good step… I just need to make another one…….

I have found in the past few attempts to put items away from the wedding, I am stuck on certain items. Items such as my bouquet, my wedding dress, my shoes, D’s flower, his hanky. I am not attached to vases, wine bottles, or votive candles. Just items that really make me remember the day and how special it was.

I am making progress and will continue to make progress. My hubby is truly awesome with this. He is completely letting my “issue” run its course. He has not said one word about the piles still in the spare bedroom or the fact my wedding dress was still on the bed. He may not understand what I am going through but he has been supportive in his own way. I completely respect that and I am very thank full of it.

Here is to another day in the sucessfullness of putting wedding items away and accepting it is over.

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